Love and Other Duds: The Cookie Chronicles

There is a new phenomenon that is sweeping the nation and killing our value ladies. Our stock is dropping! Dare I say it.  We've been hit with the Cheap Pussy Syndrome. Haven't heard of it? Maybe you'll recognize the symptoms:



You meet a guy. He's smooth, sexy, has that cute dimple in his cheek that makes you squirm with excitement. Over the span of a week or so, you two are really hitting it off. You've asked all the important questions and feel as if a live date is warranted. Naturally you want to hang out with this dude, so you two start making plans to see each other. He hits you with the I'm so busy, but maybe you can stop by for a quick drink and convos at my place. That red flag goes up, but you ignore it, thinking I got this. I won't do anything I don't want too. We can go out any time. As a good girl, you tell yourself that you're not going to do anything with him. You go over his house, have a few drinks and some flirty fun conversations. Nothing happens. He's sweet, doesn't try anything, so you start dropping your guard. Gradually, he starts inviting you over to his place more often, rather than taking you out. You're falling hard for the game, that you know is game. You do realize he hasn't taken you on a real date, but you like him so much, what's the big deal? Eventually, he lulls you into a comfortable state and you open yourself up to this man and you two have sex. Over the next few weeks, sometimes months, you two are still hanging and while you're living in a state of euphoria, dropping hints about being in a relationship, thinking you two are taking it to the next level, he's already recruiting the next one to fill your spot. You are now "dating" a man that doesn't do any of the courtly things that you believe a gentlemen should do. He doesn't take you out, only calls you on the late night, never spends real time with you and to top it all off he doesn't make any real effort to show you that he's that into you. Nonetheless, you like him that much, that you continue with this bullshit charade you call "dating" until eventually he stops responding to your texts or you realize, he's just not that into you."



These symptoms last from 1-6 weeks, but can go on for months if the man deems the sex to be worth holding on to and the female desperation is high enough.


Just like the men, there are 3 types of women. The hoe, the slut and the good girl. We definitely know there are cross-breeds here, but again, for analytic purposes, we will keep it simple.



The Hoe, is just that. She gives in order to get. She always only gives with the expectation of getting something in return.



The Slut - she sleeps around because she wants to or he wants to. Who knows. She just does, with no real reason besides the vajayjay going cray!



The Good Girl - We all know the good girl. She’s boring as hell, but for some reason or another, men claim they want her.  Possibly because she embodies the expectation of what society says is right.



Now I am using these simplistic terms because these are the categories men put us in.


Same scenario, a hoe already knows about the trap! She's staying far away because that's not what she is in this for. Sex may be a part of the meal, but its only a means to an end and ONLY when she's ready to cash it in for what she values. For starters, the hoe is telling this man where to meet her. It's not a request and he will show up because this is what she requires. He might cancel a few times (the hard ones), but they will always show up. This date is like an interview. What value can he bring to my table? What can I get out of him that I don't already have myself, while still having some fun? All questions that the hoe had in mind before she showed up. First date, they talk, get to know each other. They are in a public space so he is now forced to control himself. She might slip him a kiss at the end of the night, leading to a little more, but she doesn't fold. Gives him enough to make him feel like, yea, I am smashing that the next time we go out. Now he calls and asks her out on a date, again, he knows she requires this. Anything that will get her back to the state that she was in on the first date. She recognizes the game, has him take her out for a drink, strategically placed inside of a mall and starts calculating how she can get the most of out of him without giving up the cookie! She knows the cookie is valuable as long as it stays in the cookie jar.


Now, this is where we lose every time. In scenario one, he knows that you're that girl that will just come over and "chill". Why take you on a date when he can just invite you over, buy a bottle of wine and you're golden! You didn't require anything else, so why should he offer anything more than what he's been giving you? There's no incentive. He already has the cookie! Just think, his initial attraction to you was probably physical. He knew nothing about you except what he could see with his eyes. He doesn't have to get it. The idea alone is enough motivation. Nothing motivates a man better than the idea of sex. Your only job is to keep reminding him of your value and in the process, the real you, outside of your vagina. We know for a fact that men lose interest in things that are easy to get.

Now let me clarify, before you get it twisted. Your value is NOT in between your legs, but it is a bargaining chip that has come at a cheap price these days. There should be an investment on his part to prove he is serious about you. The biggest investment a man can give you is his time and his energy. A man that has invested these two simple things, has already made a commitment, which is ultimately what we want. Now I use the word "commitment" loosely here. I don't mean in the let's be boyfriend girlfriend sense. He's just committed himself to the idea of the possibility of some good pussy, getting a girlfriend, new fuck buddy, who knows. Bottom line is he is showing you that he can commit to something.

We should not aspire to be the hoe, but picking up on a few of her traits, isn't a bad idea. It doesn't matter how "good" you think you are. Even the good girls get hit with the Cheap Pussy Syndrome and turn slutty. It was the good girl that slept with this man solely because there was an initial connection and he had swag.

If sex is what men seek, women seek attention. Men know this. Being single can be a lonely life sometimes and a little attention feels good, but just think, men are silently reaping all the rewards and benefits and all we get is hard dick and maybe some cab money.


Why in a world that is seemingly more civilized have women allowed their value to dip so low that even we cannot determine what we think it is worth?



Till Next Time, I'm Out



Lovely